Aberrant Sexuality
by Lambert Dolphin
Aberrant means straying from the right or normal (natural) way,
or deviating from the usual or natural type. The word is from the Latin,
ab + errare meaning "to wander, to go astray." For
the purposes of our discussion, from a Biblical standpoint what is normal
and natural is (1) that which is according to creation, and (2) that which
is consistent with the revelation of truth as given to us by God in the
Bible. In a fallen world, it is not safe to say that what is common or popular
is "normal." A moral consensus by experts in society is invalid
if it contradicts the Bible. But we can not take our guidelines from "mother
nature" either. Violence is found in nature, and sexual perversion
among some of the animals---but these are not features of the creation as
God intended it from the beginning. Nature has become corrupted by evil
as has man (Rom. 8:19-23). When the Apostle Paul speaks of sexual activity
that is contrary to nature, he is referring to behavior that has departed
from the Creator's intentions when He made us. (Note: The specific term
"contrary to nature" occurs in Romans 1:26 referring to Lesbian
conduct, and in the following verse to refer to male homosexual activity.)
There are two different approaches to morality and ethics in society. Both
give valid insights and both are helpful. The first approach deals with
outward behavior, with conduct that is observable by others. Wrong behavior
is behavior which damages God, oneself, or others. A wide variety of forms
of harmful conduct are restrained by government, by law, by punishment,
and by education. It is well known that these efforts do not solve the problem
at the source. Restraint of human evil does make life bearable in a society
that would otherwise revert to anarchy and lawlessness in short order. The
courts of the land, are supposed to measure outward behavior against fixed
moral guidelines and to determine guilt or innocence largely on the basis
of objective evidence. Objective evidence does not always deal fairly with
motivations for behavior, with mitigating circumstances, with the nuances
connected with crimes of passion. Man made laws in today's world typically
have little to do God's Law and the lack of justice in today's courts is
legend.
The second approach in dealing with harmful or dysfunctional behavior in
individuals or in society is to treat wrong or harmful behavior as disease.
The cure for such inappropriate behavior is supposed by many today to be
therapy or education or re-training of the offender. The liberal minded
who reject the Biblical revelation of man's total depravity assume that
man is basically good and can be improved by dispelling man's ignorance
or by ministering to him understanding and tolerance. From a Biblical point
of view it is true that wrong behavior is indeed the fruit on the plant
whose root is man's depraved nature and sinfulness. Jeremiah is quite clear
about this when he says,
"The heart of man is deceitful above all things and desperately
wicked, who is able to understand it?" (Jeremiah 17:9)
The words of Jesus,
"Jesus called the people to him again, and said to them,
'Hear me, all of you, and understand: there is nothing outside a man which
by going into him can defile him; but the things which come out of a man
are what defile him.' And when he had entered the house, and left the people,
his disciples asked him about the parable. And he said to them, 'Then are
you also without understanding? Do you not see that whatever goes into a
man from outside cannot defile him, since it enters, not his heart but his
stomach, and so passes on?' (Thus he declared all foods clean.) And he said,
'What comes out of a man is what defiles a man. For from within, out of
the heart of man, come evil thoughts, fornication, theft, murder, adultery,
coveting, wickedness, deceit, licentiousness, envy, slander, pride, foolishness.
All these evil things come from within, and they defile a man.'" (Mark
7:14-23)
The cure for sin prescribed in the Bible is spiritual regeneration
and a cleansed interior life. Only out of a renewed spirit comes truly changed
behavior that is acceptable in the sight of a Holy God. External fixes are
no better than band-aides on cancer. Hopefully, diseases of the soul and
spirit can be mollified, corrected or healed by physicians of the soul and
by the priests of the Living God.
This author assumes that the first premise is valid. The Bible gives us
the absolute moral standard which reflects the very character of God. God
is our Creator and Jesus is our judge. Government, courts or law, schools
and human institutions need constant reformation as these, too, will be
judged by God. Though justice is long-delayed or even subverted during this
present life, absolute justice comes eventually to all men. Solomon states
this in Ecclesiastes:
"The end of the matter; all has been heard. Fear God, and
keep his commandments; for this is the whole of man. For God will bring
every deed into judgment, with every secret thing, whether good or evil"
(Ecclesiastes 12:13,14).
This essay emphasizes that the deepest healing of sin and morally dysfunctional
behavior takes place when men and women receive the grace of God and avail
themselves of the inner cleansing and healing offered by the risen Lord
Jesus. Broken sinful men and women can and do become whole persons by the
grace of God. Our emphasis is on the second method of dealing with human
evil-outlined above---in what ways are we broken people and how is that
we can become whole?
Genetic Factors and Sexual Orientation
From time to time scientific papers have claimed to show evidence for genetic
factors that account for adultery, prostitution, promiscuity or homosexuality.
Should such factors be discovered human beings are not thereby excused for
their behavior by any means. God always makes full provision for any individual
to live a fulfilling life, pleasing to Him, regardless of inborn predispositions,
family life, handicaps or faulty environment. Once we agree that man is
totally depraved in the sight of God we may as well begin also to look for
defective genes that lead to gossip, pride, irresponsibility, laziness,
or a violent temper. Eventually all behavior will then be excusable on biological
grounds alone. It is characteristic of modern man not only to deny God but
to attempt by all means possible to rationalize or excuse behavior that
is clearly wrong-harmful to society and repugnant to God.
It is certainly possible that some personality types are more predisposed
to homosexuality, for example. Genetic defects affecting the sexual organs
or hormone imbalances are rare. There is no evidence that homosexuality
is due to hormonal imbalance, and homosexuality is quite a different condition
than transsexuality for instance. A good deal of sexual behavior is clearly
learned behavior and governed by habit patterns and associated "brain
wiring." Behavioral malfunctions can be transmitted, but not genetically,
as far as is known. Dysfunctional, illegal, inappropriate, or immoral sexual
behavior must be explained on some other basis than appealing to bad genes.
Jesus Christ gave his life as a sacrifice for all men and for all their
sins. The theological statement that Christ was a substitutionary sacrifice
means that He took my place and yours and that He identified 100% with our
condition in such a way that "he who knew no sin was made sin for us,
so that we might become the righteousness of God in him" (2 Cor. 5:21).
"The Sins Of The Fathers"
"The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow
to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness, keeping steadfast
love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who
will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers
upon the children and the children's children, to the third and the fourth
generation" (Exodus 34:5-7).
In some manner (exactly how we do not know) certain moral weaknesses in
one generation tend to propagate into subsequent generations. The influence
Noah's drunkenness (Gen. 9:20-27) had on his grandson Canaan is an example.
Probably it is maladjusted behavior in dysfunctional families which communicates
information (mostly unconsciously) causing a particular form of aberrant
behavior (such as alcoholism or homosexuality) to spring up one or more
generations later. It is well known that involvement in the occult can cause
demonic obsession and related moral problems such as incest, for several
generations. Unclean demonic spirits can plague those who are promiscuous
or involved in pornography, and so on.
Dysfunctional Families
One contemporary psychologist whose lectures have been popular on National
Public Television is John Bradshaw. He analyzes dysfunctional families to
show all kinds of disordered patterns in the underlying behavior patterns
of typical families, describing how these patterns tend to perpetuate themselves
in the next generation. He notes that we, in our nation, have experienced
200 years of increasing family dysfunction which is propagated by default
until we come to see ourselves as we really are, accept legitimate suffering
as part of life, and find personal wholeness. Bradshaw is a former Roman
Catholic priest whose views reflect to some degree his Christian heritage.
He is interested in helping all manner of persons embark on a path to emotional
and spiritual health. It is easy to be critical of Bradshaw's assumptions,
teaching, and liberal gnostic-like theology. However his x-rays of the family
are often insightful and helpful. Once we acknowledge the deep flaws of
original sin in all of us, it is logical to extend these to the home and
family. The figure below is taken from one of Bradshaw's books.
Childhood Response Patterns to Life
New born infants are helpless, totally dependent, and do not at first think
of themselves as differentiated from their total environment, especially
from their mothers. Their emotional tape recorders are running even before
they are born. At first a baby does not see itself as separate from even
its environment. He or she is an extension of Mother and one with the environment.
It is not long until it discovers, however, that it has some control over
its immediate environment. Children learn how to avoid pain by modifying
their behavior one way or another, and they learn how to get their needs
met also. We might even say that some children soon learn to be clever and
diabolical. Since all parents treat their kids differently, spoiling them,
over-indulging them, losing patience with them, disciplining inconsistently
and so on---the principle of avoiding pain and maximizing pleasure plays
a part in early childhood experience. It is during this time of life that
children learn to "choreograph the flesh." When, as Christian
adults, we revert to behaving "in the flesh" we usually lapse
into patterns of behavior that have worked for us in the past by trial and
error. These are by nature selfish patterns designed to serve our own best
interests as we perceive them.
The term "flesh" refers to our sinful inheritance from Adam---it
is deceitful, manipulative and contriving. The spirit of the Christian has
been redeemed and regenerated, his soul (mind, emotions, and will) is being
renewed, however the body has not yet been redeemed and is the seat of many
of these desires and passions of the flesh, (Romans 8:10,11).
A commonly quoted verse in Proverbs has been misunderstood by some: "Train
up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart
from it" (Prov. 22:6). Many parents have assumed this verse meant that
if children were given lessons in the Bible when they were young, they would
come to God eventually, later on in life if not sooner. The passage actually
teaches that parents are to understand each child as he or she is---that
is to figure out who they are as person---and then train each one of them
according to that child's own way. It is such personalized knowing of one's
offspring that helps insure against the child's developing a detrimental
fleshly response to life early on.
Research in recent years places emphasis on bonding of parent and child.
A child should learn experientially at the earliest possible stage that
he or she is loved unconditionally, and wanted, and valued. Nothing is more
devastating than rejection, real or imagined, especially when we are young
and most vulnerable. However in view of the total depravity of mankind resulting
from the fall, we ought not to be surprised at the many different ways in
which evil can surface in any one of us, regardless of the quality of our
upbringing. Though fallen, we bear the image of God our Creator, and we
are the supreme objects of His love for us because His Son, our Lord Jesus,
has died in our place.
Mothers usually instinctively love, care for, nourish and pay constant attention
to their children. This is (sadly) not universally so in our world. Baby
boys and baby girls certainly need to sense that mother loves them and treasures
them and always will. The Apostle Paul writes, "...woman will find
her fulfillment in bearing children, if they (the children) continue in
faith and love and holiness, with modesty" (1 Timothy 2:15.). If a
son ends up in jail, or drunk on skid row, a mother carries this as not
only sorrow but as a possible indicator of her own personal failure. If
on the other hand, children do well in life, this is a mother's joy and
reward. Ideally the father should also begin to show affection for his child
as soon as possible after birth and spend much quality time with his son
or daughter thereafter. In this way the father gives affirmation from a
man's point of view. He also provides a secure male role model of accepting,
caring love.
Archetypes
All human beings have certain experiences in common. In the world around
us we observe rooted patterns of human behavior that are more than one generation
deep. They are more than mere human customs or traditions, they are universal
responses to instincts and to the world. Carl Jung called these deep seated
response patterns to life, "archetypes." The Greek word tupos
(type) means a blow or imprint, such as the impression made by a seal,
a stamp, or a die. Arche means beginning. Although the word archetype
is not in the New Testament, in psychology it has come to mean strong patterns
of response or behavior ingrained in man from of old. Faced we a given stimulus,
human beings tend to be influenced in their behavior by archetypes that
lie in the subconscious. In Jungian psychology archetypes are given great
importance. Jung believed the archetypes had positive and negative aspects,
that is, they could be helpful or harmful to us. The archetypes are said
to be "numinous" that is, invested with great power, like magnets
or force-fields. When as person draws too near to a particular archetype
he can be overwhelmed or captured by its field. Some of the contents of
an archetype can be brought into consciousness (for example, by coming to
understand a variety of mothers and fathers in the real world, and by observing
good marriages and bad). In this way our understanding of human behavior
patterns and culture does not remain at the primitive stage of childhood
where myths and imaginary beings inhabit the world as we first suppose it
to be. The goal of Christian discipleship is to know God and thereby to
know ourselves. We can not hope to relate to others with a greater depth
or wisdom than we have attained first in our intimate knowing of God. This
fact is summarized by the two Great Commandments which Jesus taught were
at the heart of all of the Law and the Prophets. Carl Jung never gave a
clear statement to let us know whether or not he ever became a true Christian.
Much of his teaching is gnostic. We must use Jung's insights into the unconscious
with care.
Missing Fathers
A small child may not see its father's importance or role in the home as
being of the same subjective weight as that of its mother. A major deficiency
in the family today is surely the "missing" American father. Fathers
who are truly never there (as in the case of single moms raising kids with
no man around the house) probably do less harm than fathers who are at home
every day but passive, recessive, detached and uninvolved (at least in the
perception of the child). This is especially serious on three counts. First,
God is a Father---our first dim notions and ideas of what God is like are
modeled after the father image, the father archetype we acquired in earliest
childhood. It is a father's responsibility to show love, compassion, touching,
caring concern for his children from the day they are born, if the child
is to find it easy to know the Father-heart of God. It is the father's job
not only to provide for his family, but to lead and protect, to set limits
and safe boundaries.
At first mother is the most important person in the child's world upon whom
the child is most dependent. But the child's psyche is also recording impressions
about father, about marriage, and about siblings and other persons in and
around the family circle. The most important of these factors: mother, father,
and marriage, are imprinted in the child's mind as archetypes. They will
be deeply rooted in the child's way of viewing the world, and they are in
all of us.
Children need to see from actual experience that mothers and fathers
do not have the same, identical priorities in life. They are not carbon
copies of one another---men and women are different in emotional priorities
as well as in their physical features. Early in life a child realizes that
adults come in two sexes. The child then begins to integrate into himself
or herself the total masculine/feminine inheritance received from his parents.
Ideally a child of either sex should not be afraid to being like his father
as well as like his mother while still becoming a distinctively his or her
own male or female person.
Women do their best when they are given strong, steady, regular encouragement
and loving leadership by their husbands. Women who do not receive this regular
assurance from their husbands (or from God if there is no husband present),
tend to become insecure, over-protective of their children, and often live
their lives unfulfilled and anxious. In such cases, the child may not receive
as much affirmation as he or should ought to receive from either a father
or a mother. In this way deep-seated needs to be loved and accepted, fears
and anxieties of all sorts, even a sense of inadequacy may be transmitted
to the child. He or she then may grow up with a great deal of unfulfilment.
Persons who grow up starved for love and affection are more vulnerable to
exploitation and seduction. Or they may be given to excess striving for
approval which they never find.
In the terms popularized by John Bradshaw, we could say that numerous people
in today's society live "shame-based" lives. "Toxic shame"
is generated in a child when his or her needs are not being met by parents
and the child assumes this indicates the child (not the parents) are no
good, flawed, damaged and worthless. Some parents are strict in their discipline.
They put well-defined boundaries in and around the child, usually to keep
the child from ranging too far from principles for wholesome living in later
life. Consistent discipline, lovingly applied produces security in a child.
Undisciplined children are often insecure and of course may find themselves
without any built-in moral restraints later in life.
Too much discipline, or discipline for the wrong reasons is not the right
approach anymore than too permissive an upbringing. Our purpose here is
only to call attention to discipline as one of the factors that influences
our early development for good or for ill.
Some recent psychological studies have shown that lack of adequate early-childhood
affirmation from the parent of the opposite sex tends to set the stage for
heterosexual promiscuity in later life, or the inability to develop and
keep a stable marriage. Until a few years ago it was believed that male
homosexuality was predisposed by over-protective mothers who held back their
sons or controlled them, preventing them from entering the rough and tumble
world of boyhood. Newer studies by Elizabeth Moberly (Ref. 1) , an English
psychiatrist, and Leanne Payne (Ref. 2), an American Christian leader and
scholar, have shown that the primary predisposing factor in homosexuality
is a lack of same-sex affirmation. Leanne Payne points out that both boys
and girls need to be "called forth" from identification with their
mothers, by their fathers, in order to see themselves as whole, independent
men or women.
Men especially can not live out their inner sufficiency of love and affirmation
unless they have first received this reservoir from Another. A boyhood situation
in which dad is a recessive or non-existent influence may leave a young
boy without a positive role model and an innate feeling that if God exists
He is hostile and non-affirming. Homosexual males are frequently troubled
by same-sex envy or sexual covetousness---because they feel incomplete and
are seeking their missing qualities in other males. Joseph Nicolosi's (Ref.
3) research has shown that boys usually begin to bond with their fathers
between ages 3 to 5. This bonding requires that the boy sees himself as
different in kind from his mother and by nature more like his father. Young
girls do not need to make this radical transition---breaking a close bond
with mother in order to identify with the world of father and the priorities
of masculinity. This is not to argue that father's are unimportant in the
raising of girls, there is ample evidence that this is definitely not the
case. The whole idea is that masculinity is fragile and is born out a background
"sea" of femininity. Hormonally this is the case in fetal development.
It is also true in childhood when it becomes time for a boy to move away
from mother towards father-an often risky step.
The "mother" is an important archetype as well that real woman
who was physical mother to us. The archetype of the "great mother"
formed an important plank in Jung's model of human sexuality and of the
unconscious. Mother earth, mother nature, the great mother goddess, the
virgin mother and the great harlot of the Bible are all positive or negative
of this deep influence in life in Jungian theory. It is not our purpose
to lend credence to all that Jung believed by any means, in fact we urge
caution is attempting to integrating many of his ideas into a Christian
world-view. But most of us can think of examples of boys or even men we
know who remain under mother's influence and unconscious control well beyond
a appropriate age for separation from mother, if there is no father, if
father is unapproachable, cold, or indifferent, and/or if mother is controlling,
manipulative or possessive.
Human father's are our first models in life of what God is like! The absence
of a warm, loving, caring father in the home leaves a vacuum in the child's
heart and makes it difficult for the child to establish a close, intimate,
trusting relationship with God as Father.
In our discussion of man as created in the image of God, and man as conscious/unconscious
we alluded to the possibility that unpleasant, traumatic experiences in
life can be repressed into the unconscious where they may lay dormant possibly
for years.
In Freudian psychoanalytic theory, these traumas cause fractional portions
of the life-energy (called libido) to flow backwards into the conscious
and into these "complexes" which become "energy laden"
or as Jung would say, "numinous." When blocks, inhibitions and
barriers are removed, these complexes tend to surface, like volleyballs
submerged in a swimming pool. This is desirable become the previously unavailable
repressed energy necessary to maintain the complex now becomes available
to consciousness. The content of the "neurosis" can be integrated
into one's view of self in a health manner, by God's grace, and this speeds
along the individual towards the wholeness which is God's goal for him or
for her. The sketch below suggests this view of buried energy centers resulting
from traumatic experiences. Though we are not aware of the existence of
these complexes until they are near the surface, their existence means we
have less available creative energy available for living real life and the
influence of the complexes will make themselves felt in our unconscious
behavior patterns, usually in a detrimental way.
The Latency Period and Adolescent Influences
Complex and varied emotional factors of early childhood enter into the equations
of a child's emerging sexual identity. Most psychologists claim these influences
are most important during the first three to six years of life. During the
latency period, prior to puberty peer influences (especially in today's
world) begin to strongly influence a child's ideas of what it will be like
to grow up. Television apparently now puts far more into the brain of the
average child than he or she will ever learn in school. Our adult behavior
patterns will be the inevitable result of the kind and quality of information
we programmed into the computers of our minds---according to the principle
of computers, "garbage in equals garbage out." Because of readily
available pornography, movies and TV shows full of explicit or at least
inferred sexual immorality, because of antichristian sex education programs
in the public schools, many youngsters begin to act out aberrant sexuality
even before puberty imitating what they suppose "normal" adult
behavior will be like.
Puberty varies in age of onset in different parts of the world. Girls usually
begin to sexually mature earlier than boys. Biological clocks turn on the
increased production of male and female sex hormones at puberty which produce
the physical developmental changes in the bodies of young men and women.
Freudian psychoanalytic theory believes that children during adolescence
pass through an auto-erotic stage of development, followed by perhaps a
short season of homo-erotic experimentation. Unless development is arrested,
or regresses due to trauma, the third stage of normal psycho-sexual development
is the emergence of sexual interest in and attraction for the opposite sex.
Rights of passage, such as the Jewish Bar Mitzvah are valuable traditions
in marking the transition to adult responsibilities and challenges.
In addition to loving our children and granting them unconditional love
and periodic affirmation, all children require moral teaching, training,
sex-education, and discipline. They need not understand, and indeed can
not understand, why they are being disciplined in every instance. The important
thing is for them to learn respect for authority, obedience, and acceptable
social and societal behavior. In addition to unconditional love, conditional
love is also important for all of us to learn in childhood, because many
rewards in life are delayed and postponed, or they come only through hard
work and patience. We live in a world where we must work to earn a living
and pay our own way. God loves us unconditionally, but that is of little
value to us if we do not take steps to grow and learn to please Him by re-ordering
our actions and life-styles. Sex education surely is primarily the responsibility
of parents and the church beginning at a very early age. By providing good
role models, a good home life, and Biblical understanding, Christian parents
should diligently seek to help their children find the Lord Jesus at an
early age and to grow up to be balanced and whole citizens in the midst
of a crooked and perverse generation.
Unfortunately in today's society most adolescents learn not from godly parents
or from church, but from peers, magazines, television and non-family sources.
Tragically, in the teen-age years nearly every young person in today's society
discovers sexual experience with another person, taking this to be healthy
and normal. But, our first sexual experience seems to deeply imprint us,
sometimes setting in concrete harmful patterns of sexual behavior that will
last for a lifetime. Because sexual activity is pleasureful, it is re-enforced
by experience (regardless of whether it is right or wrong-although a guilty
conscience can be a deterrent).
Pastor Brian Morgan of Peninsula Bible Church South notes that homosexual
behavior, for example, is safer in terms of person-to-person psychological
risk, and less demanding compared to relating to the opposite sex. Adult
wholeness requires much more self-giving and willingness to relate to another
person whose ways of thinking and responding are not those of one's own
sex.Freud and others believed that homosexual behavior was a form of arrested
development. Until the sexual revolution in the last half of our century,
doctors and psychologists dealt with homosexuality as a form of pathological,
neurotic behavior. When gay rights became politicized, lobbying efforts
by the gay community pressured the American psychoanalytic community into
changing its standards to reflect the secular view that homosexual lifestyles
were normal. Similar pressures have resulted in many states dropping their
old laws prohibiting homosexual acts, sodomy and such. California is among
the states where a consenting adults law on the books removes penalties
for sexual acts between two adults regardless of sex or type. Secular humanistic
groups who deny the existence of God and moral absolutes have dominated
the educational system in the past few decades. This situation reflects
a widespread breakdown in Biblical values and a sad devaluation of the traditional
family unit which as Christians know is the basis for a stable and healthy
society. Incest and childhood sexual abuse can do horrendous damage to children.
Often the trauma is repressed and even forgotten. The common occurrence
of these problems, along with violence, promiscuity and wide-spread divorce
shows that our society today is in an advanced stage of breakdown (see Romans
1:18-32).
Psychological theories often call attention to repressed or buried memories
and experiences which can generate neurotic and even psychotic behavior
if not dealt with. In addition to sinning against others, we have all been
victims. Sometimes victims even blame themselves for what has happened to
them. Children may imagine that things went wrong in the family because
they were born. Or, they attempt to take on the unresolved conflicts of
their parents and make them their own. Carl Jung's view of wholeness (which
he called "individuation") supposes that the unconscious is a
friend not a foe, and that there is an innate striving for wholeness within
man which attempts to resolve buried inner conflict and to reconcile outer
reality with inward. Thus, in the right circumstance repressed libido and
the emotional content of traumatized areas in the unconscious can surface,
become integrated, and be healed in the light of day. Jung, though probably
not a Christian, seems to go so far as to recognize that such healing is
a work of God's grace.
George Gilder is his classic book, Men and Masculinity(?) points out that virtually all of the crime, violence, drug dealing, and
numerous pressing social problems arise from unmarried adolescent young
men. Marriage he notes, is often the only way such men ever learn to be
responsible. They are irresponsible and reckless pagans until civilized
by the demands of pressures of marriage.
Man as the Temple of God
A careful study of the tabernacle of Moses and the Temple of Solomon will
show that these buildings are wonderful maps of the interior of man. Nancy
Missler (Ref 5) has written a comprehensive analysis of the temple as a
guide book to wholeness in Christ.
The Tabernacle of Moses, and the First and Second Temples in Jerusalem
were built according to Divine blueprints. They were places of worship where
man approached God. Since the Bible insists that man is the true dwelling
place of God, the Tabernacle and its furniture is also a picture of "inner
space" ---the interior of man.
In Conclusion
Knowing and better understanding ourselves because of the Searchlight working
of the Holy Spirit in us is more important than mere conformity to external
rules or laws or traditions-even in a godly society. Appropriating the mercy
and grace of our God depends upon seeing ourselves as we really are. We
must not fail to accept the changes God wishes to work in us to make us
over again into men and women who are re-modeled not after the First Adam,
but the Second.
"Finally, though I have had to speak at some length about
sex, I want to make it as clear as I possibly can that the centre of Christian
morality is not here. If anyone thinks that Christians regard unchastity
as the supreme vice, he is quite wrong. The sins of the flesh are bad, but
they are the least bad of all sins. All the worst pleasures are purely spiritual:
the pleasure of putting other people in the wrong, of bossing and patronizing
and spoiling sport, and back-biting; the pleasures of power, of hatred.
For there are two things inside me, competing with the human self which
I must try to become. They are the Animal self, and the Diabolical self.
The Diabolical self is the worse of the two. That is why a cold, self-righteous
prig who goes regularly to church may be far nearer to hell than a prostitute.
But, of course, it is better to be neither." (C. S. Lewis, Mere
Christianity)
Selected References
Why Some Christians Commit Adultery, by John L. Sandford, (Victory
House, Tulsa, 1989). Deals with the more deep-seated and serious types of
sexual sin and their root causes.
Healing Victims of Sexual Abuse, by Paul Sandford, (Victory
House, Tulsa, 1988). Shows how love, acceptance and compassion are central
to healing those who have been abused.
The Wounded Heart: Hope for Adult Victims of Childhood Sexual Abuse,
by Daniel B. Allender, (Navpress, Colorado Springs, 1990). Reveals the long
terms and often disastrous effects of unresolved sexual abuse in childhood.
The Broken Image and Healing Presence, by Leanne
Payne (Crossway Books, Westchester, IL.). Especially helpful in understanding
homosexuality and the damage to sexual identity caused by abuse.
Psychogenesis by Elizabeth Moberley.
Reparative Therapy of Male Homosexuality: A New Clinical Approach,
by Joseph Nicolosi, PhD. Jason Aronson, Inc., New York, 1991.
George Gilder, to be supplied.
The Way of Agage, by Nancy Missler, Koinonia House, PO Box
D, Coeur d'Alene, Idaho 83816-0347
QUEST FOR SEXUAL IDENTITY SEMINAR
Held at Peninsula Bible Church, Palo Alto, California, November 20-21, 1987.
Individual Tapes, $2.25 each plus $1.00 postage minimum, Entire series of
21 tapes, $49.50, postpaid. Address Orders to: Discovery Tapes, 3505 Middlefield
Road; Palo Alto, California 94306.
- Plenary Session #1: Male and Female Roles: Biblical Perspectives, Ray
Stedman and Male and Female Roles: Psychology and Research by John White
M.D.
- Plenary Session #2 Biblical Absolutes and Consequences in Society by
Ray Stedman and Sexuality: A Bane and a Blessing by John White M.D., (two
tapes)
- Sexually Transmitted Diseases, Arthur Halliday, M.D.
- Pornography - Sex Education, by Joanne Masokowski
- Single Parenting by Walt and June McCuistion
- Separation, Adultery, Divorce and Remarriage, by Doug Goins
- The Priceless Value of Life, by Connie David
- Choices: Adolescence, Dating and Courtship, by Gary Vanderet
- Marriage, by Ron and Anne Marie Ritchie
- Aberrant Sexuality, by Lambert Dolphin
- Singleness: A Curse, and Excuse, or an Opportunity, by Gay Zimmerman
- Am I My Brother's Keeper?, by Paul Winslow
- Transformation and Healing, by Greg and Altha Burts
- What is the Link Between Worship and Sex?, by Brian Morgan
- Replying to False Theologies of Sexuality, by Aahmes E. Overton
- Women in the Church, Women at Home, Women at Work, by Elaine Stedman
- How to Help a Homosexual Relative or Friend, by Phyllis Thurston, M.D.
- The Great Sexual Hoax, by Linda Wermuth Skerbec
- The Abusers and the Abused, by John White, M. D.
- Managing Sexual Drives Before Marriage, by John Hanneman.
Email:
lambert@ldolphin.org
Web Pages: http://ldolphin.org/
March 4, 1991, revised May 9, 1991