Mark Goeller, July 1, 2003. markgoeller@hotmail.com
Background:
We launched the PAD in Killeen Texas under the umbrella of the NAV ministry in 1998-2000. In the 2 _ years it was open over 12 guys lived in the home, usually 4 to 5 at a time. The PAD created some of the best memories and friendships of my time while at Hood and became a catalyst where Jesus working in countless lives
General characteristics of the home:
- Psalm 133 was out theme
- It was under an umbrella of a larger ministry
- It provided an atmosphere where relationships were accelerated
in Jesus
- Primarily led from within- the initiative was from the guys
living in the home, not from ministry staff trying to launch it
- The home thrived when we walked in a spirit of serving one another
and struggled when personal agenda's emerged
- The home was a revolving door for other in the ministry to hang
out
Practical aspects
- We met once a week to pray, worship, confess, and talk through
tensions in the home. We would also cover administrative issues.
This meeting was critical and didn't happen without making it
a priority. It provided a means once a week to bring into the
open underlying tensions that are inevitable when living together.
Only people living in the home could be at this meeting unless
invited as a guest to share.
- Once a month at this meeting we invited an outsider to come
and speak into our lives. We had a wide range of awesome people
in ministry share with us informally
- We wrote a one page list of house rules together and posted
them in the entry way. They were simple- like always keeping
the home clean so your mom could visit. We structured the home
to be able to work out problems internally, but when a larger
issued arose, to be able to meet with the umbrella ministry leaders.
- We opened a non prophet checking account to handle all money.
Each guy wrote one check a month to the PAD that covered rent,
all bills, and a little more. As the spirit of the home grew,
people wanted to give to the home as a way to ministry, serve,
and build up what was developing. Then rent and bills were paid
from the PAD checkbook. Surplus grew and became an operational
fund for general home needs, buying bulk food, and doing fun events
together. We also had a donations coffee can in the living room
that allowed others to help the ministry of the home.
- We tried to have a more formal sit down dinner together once
a week to build community.
- We formalized a name and sought to create an atmosphere and
purpose for the home that was larger than any one person living
there. We held a formal dedication party with prayer and sharing.
We continually took pictures and built photo collogues hung around
the PAD to build memories and share with others the fun and history
of the home.
- Spirit of serving. We used Brother Lawrence's book, Practice
of the Presence of God, and his story about worshiping while
doing dishes to instill a desire to serve one another. We "competed"
to see who could out serve the others.
- Standards: the brothers agreed upon standards about how we
wanted to live and what we wanted other to experiences when they
came over. This impacted what movies we had in the home, books,
music, posters, etc. Over time our standards seemed to get higher.
- We worked to build an atmosphere where the other sex felt safe
and honored. One rule agreed upon was no guy would be in a room
of the home alone with a gal. Transparency and perception: living
lives above reproach.
- Web page. A friend built a WEB page that shared our history
and had a place for a photo and written testimony of each person
in the home.
Problems we encountered:
- Leadership in the home. As men moved in and out, the nature
of the home changed. It was key to have internal leadership,
but a few times some members were more dominant that others and
tensions arose. Servant leadership is imperative and requires
constant vigilance.
- Internet sin: several brothers struggled secretly with internet
pornography that wasn't revealed to late in the house life. If
there is an open internet access it needs to be a critical part
of meeting together weekly to hold each other accountable.
- Money problems. The checkbook was critical to having a third
party hold money over time. It is important to have two people
at a minimum handle the checkbook. We never had a problem but
without accountability it is possible. We had one brother steel
from the donations can over time. Once confronted he confessed
and it turned into a teaching time. We had one brother not able
to pay rent. At first others pitched in to help, but over time
it became a growing tension in the home. Having clear requirements
from the beginning is key.
- Failing to meet regularly. Sometimes we all were busy and failed
to meet together. Most of our problems developed when they were
ignored and not tackled early. It is critical to meet regularly.